TMI Thursday: What If?

As you know, I don't really do TMI Thursday, even when I "do" it. I'm not easily embarrassed & I'm also not willingly personal about much of my life, as I was reminded the other day when my mother sent me an email urging me to remove my anti-JDate post. As she threatened to stop reading my blog (is that a painful threat?!),* she provided me with a reminder that plenty of the people I know in real life also go home to their Google Readers, where they then read through my innermost thoughts.

OK, that's a lie. You are not privy to my innermost thoughts, folks. Only the suburban/city-related ones. Mostly the ones that involve me passing judgment on other people.

But what if you DID have front row seats to the inner workings of this brain? What if I DID participate in TMI Thursday's, LiLu- and Maxie-style? What would your Suburban Sweetheart be churning out come the fourth work day of every week?

So this post is a tease. But so what? You know you're curious. If I were to participate fully in TMI Thursday, here are a few of my would-be post titles. You can imagine their would-be content for yourself.

• TMI Thursday: 'I'm Being Chased. Can I Chill on Your Porch?'
• TMI Thursday: Happy Birthday to Me - A Mean Right Hook & a Hard Sidewalk
• TMI Thursday: Auld Lang Syne & Why All Acquaintance WILL Be Forgot By This Time Next Year
  
• TMI Thursday: New York State of (Absent-)Mind(ed-At-A-Sketchy-Bar)
  
• TMI Thursday: It's OK, This Bathroom Floor Was More Comfortable Than My Bed
• TMI Thursday: 'Hey, Mom, I Thought You Should Know...'
  
• TMI Thursday: Good Morning, Thanks for Breakfast, & of COURSE I Haven't Been Here All Night!
• TMI Thursday: The Double Entendre of Inauguration Weekend
• TMI Thursday: 'Is Your Gas Worth More Than My Life?'
  
• TMI Thursday: 'You Should Learn to Chew Your Food Better'
• TMI Thursday: That What I Get for Waking up in Vegas
• TMI Thursday: Grasshopper Breath & the Jonas Pledge
• TMI Thursday: 'Will You Google the Age of Consent for Me?'
• TMI Thursday: His Futon Feels Exactly Like MY Futon!
• TMI Thursday: Why Ponytails Are a Weakness in Battle
  

The best part of writing these has not been recalling all my humiliating life achievements but anticipating what sort of way-worse-than-real-life shenanigans others might conjure up based upon the titles I've provided. Tell me whatcha got?


*I know you're still reading this, Mom.